I am forging ahead with this one in all its strange messiness (click to enlarge):
And I also started this one:
I have such a heavy hand with colored pencil. I get such satisfaction from laying down that rich, saturated color that *poof* all chances of softly blending colors are gone. Maybe I should try watercolor. It would be easier to transport a small box of watercolors than a big bag of my acrylic tubes to the library if I really do want to paint.
I suppose what I am doing with my art is this: telling tidbits of my life. Weaving small stories, small moments together. I've struggled for a long time as an artist wondering if what I have to say is big enough, important enough. Maybe it's not about trying to shout really loudly. or saying something brand new and completely different. Maybe it's just about... going to the library every Wednesday and Friday. Maybe it IS about just showing up and doing what feels right.
So what I really want to know is this: if I enjoy the journey (and I do, I really really do), does that mean I'll have a successful show at the end of it?
There. Do you see my dilemma?
I'd like to focus on the journey, but I can't help wanting to know if the end result will be a good one. Will people like my art enough to actually buy it? And if I'm so hung up on that question... who am I making art for??????
Kate: interesting question you ask and one I struggle with in writing. I'm not content to think that I can just write and enjoy the process without some measure of "success" (= publishing) because, for better or for worse, I think I have something to say, as you do with your art, and you want to say it to someone, whomever that might be. And if someone appreciates what you have to say (buys a piece, publishes a piece), that's even better, because now you know that what you had to say meant something to someone.
ReplyDeleteI'm not writing right now but think about it every day and know I will get back to it and maybe I'll be better than I was before. Your blog is making me think I can actually do it soon, armed with a babysitter and a library nearby (but not the North Branch!). When are you moving back? My offer still stands to pay for the moving van because I need friends here!!!
Laura
Laura!!! I almost peed in my pants when I read your comment! I'm so excited that you're "out there." You know EXACTLY what I mean, and I love love love that. (And am I seriously inspiring you to make a writing trek to the library?!! Be still my heart.)
ReplyDeleteHave the moving truck here tomorrow morning please, thank you.
xo
dear dear kate,
ReplyDeletethe dilemma...i feel the same way...writing this blog, i know my friends, like you, read it and always tell me such encouraging things. and for that i am truly thankful. but i wonder, does anyone else out there find it as interesting or entertaining? is it helpful in anyway? would i be able to move forward and create my own show from this? does anyone out there want to watch? i guess i won't know that answer for sure, and i feel like its like your art... but i guess, i can't stop, i have to keep trying, whether i know there is going to be something at the end of the tunnel. i have to just do what i love, no matter what. its what makes me happy, eating and sharing my thoughts. such as your art, it brings your joy. don't ever give it up...i love your stuff! you are so creative and i love that you put snippits of your life into your art work. i believe in you. just don't stop and we will find a way to get your work out there!!! miss you much.
xoxo
ps i hope that all makes sense. i'd much rather just talk on the phone with you.
I know you will have a successful show. Your work is awesome, inspiring and interesting and it is a piece of you which is beautiful. Keep up the work and you will have a show very soon and it will be successful because your mind will be free. Having time to do what you love to do is good for the soul.
ReplyDeleteI feel the same way as Laura. I am writing slowly but surely, but it is hard to keep writing when I know the finished product is so far in the future (ie: your show and for me final revisions and getting published).
I feel like the more positive and creative people I surround myself with the more encouraged and motivated I am to continue. We can continue to inspire each other!
your work is great!! I absolutely love the piece for your blog header! Wonderful.
ReplyDeleteOh my goodness! thank you guys for all the support. i feeeeel the love.
ReplyDeleteand khristian, your blog is fabulous. i'm a regular now ;)